From Fear to Love

How Creativity Saved My Life and Will Change Yours for the Better

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From Chapter 5 - "Abundance"

Abundance, tempera on paper, 2011

In August of 2011... I found myself painting a sunrise, with a never-ending supply of blue spheres (which most people think of as hay bales and that’s ok with me – if they ask, I explain) rolling along and down the hill.

I noticed, over the subsequent days and weeks, that whenever I looked at it, I felt a glimmer of hope, of happiness, however brief. I named it Abundance, trusting that even though I didn’t feel it yet, I believed it was my destiny to receive it.

I wanted to frame it, to honor my newfound awareness.  Still uncertain, not yet referring to myself as an artist, I heard myself asking the framing specialist “is this good enough to frame?” She kindly said yes, pointing out certain elements, and proceeding to guide me. I selected triple matting (3 different matts, each one a different color to draw attention into the painting), the perfect frame (with little spheres all around), and museum quality glass. One thing I knew: if it really was good enough to frame, I wanted it to last at least my lifetime. It was worth it and I was worth it. 

Two weeks later, I held that beautiful finished product in my hands, looked at it with a sense of wonder and abundance, and proclaimed out loud for the first time in my life…

 “I am an artist.”

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